No one has time. Most people would spend a fortune to have more time. Our schedules are so tightly knit that not a single free minute remains. Especially partnership and family suffer when we are in permanent stress.

Ask yourself the question:

What is important in a relationship?

How stressed am I, how often do I feel overwhelmed, how often do I simply have no time?

In many phases of my life, I would probably have stated at least “often,” if not “all the time.”

Lack of time is a fundamental problem in partnerships. While the numbers tell us that communication is the main reason for divorce, in many cases it is the lack of time that causes the difficulty in communication. The problem is that we usually blame our circumstances for not having time. The work, the many appointments, the school, the boss. But there are a few simple tricks you can use to get a handle on your time management.


Ask yourself the following questions:

What would your ideal schedule look like?

How does your partner feel about your schedule?

What kind of person would you like to become?


Exhaustion or a full tank?

The biggest danger for your partnership is if you permanently try to drive with an empty tank. By that I mean your reserves of strength and energy. If you live at your limit, then you can’t work on your relationship. You won’t be willing to give your partner the love they need. You will take above all because you have to survive yourself somehow.

The exhaustion is dangerous for your relationship/marriage, your family and your work colleagues.

There are characteristics by which we can tell if we are doing well at the moment or if we are running on fumes. Now before you start refilling your tank, identify the leaks in your tank.

What are the holes in your energy tank:

Are you a person who can’t say no?
Do you draw your identity and self-esteem from your performance?
Do you feel guilty when you take time for yourself?

If you now know your energy level and have found your leak, then you should make a decision. Talk to your partner about your and your situation. Make a promise to yourself and your partner to address your exhaustion. Your partner may have a similar problem and you can help each other or seek help together if necessary.

Several factors are necessary for a plant to grow: Water, light, carbon dioxide and oxygen, nutrients, and a certain air temperature. You can’t just leave out the water and expect that enough light will make up for it. All participants are necessary.

In our lives, and consequently in a relationship, it is the same: there are some basic factors in a person’s life that are necessary in order not to burn out. Or spoken with the plant: without breaking in. Getting and keeping these areas of life in order is important for yourself and the relationship with your partner, because ultimately it makes you a balanced and satisfied person.


Want to learn even more about this and other important issues in a healthy relationship? Then download the free Lifelongapp and discover numerous exciting topics about relationships, partnership and what is important in a relationship.